The conditioned self can be sneaky and oh so self righteous — full of justifications for its existence. We feel it when we are in a suboptimal state of being or triggered. This idea of being triggered is crucial. For when we are triggered, we are reactive, not responsive. Our reactions don’t fully feel within our control and/or are not congruent with our real self.
Where did you land on that question about the value of our work? Did you tap into some new understanding or appreciation for your efforts?
The INC article on the five hour rule lit me up. The idea behind the five hour rule is that spending five hours a week learning not only increases your intelligence but can contribute to mastery. Having trained therapists, coach
“I’m so much more of who I am and so much less of who I think I should be.” This is the news that greeted me when talking with a client recently. This kind of news lights me up as a therapist. It makes oh so clear how valuable our work is. Do you know how valuable your work is?
“The world and enlightenment, they are one and the same.” ~ Saichi
Jake looked dreadful. His usual light-hearted jovial glow was clouded and grey. He readily recognized that he was carrying the load of the stories he’d been hearing from folks affected by the fires here in the Great Smoky Mountains.
I’ve read lots of articles recently about being with family in such a highly charged political environment. As healing arts professionals, most of us have worked long and hard on developing our skills in listening, setting boundaries and standing in what’s true for us without bashing the “other.” Nonetheless, it can be challenging, the best thing I’ve read so far on this topic was …
I join many millions this week as we reconcile ourselves to the election results and what they tell us about our collective evolution and unmet needs. For me, this began with grief in all its manifestations. For others, it began with excitement. Regardless of who you voted for or who your clients voted for., there are strong reactions.
As a young therapist, I was not completely comfortable saying “I’m a therapist.” It felt much more congruent to stand in “I practice psychotherapy.” It’s a practice, the more we do it, the better we get. Practice implies a deep engagement with the subject of practice. Practice is distinct from work.
Our conditioned, false self is like a cloak of veils woven from our wounds, limited beliefs and idealized self images. Tethered to traumas and fears, the sorrows and pain of unmet needs and defeated goals, we mistake this limited being for our real self. Our clients do the same thing. One of the easiest ways to begin unmasking this limited self is to address reactivity.
“It just seems selfish,” Amy responded, glancing at her husband. On his face, I saw what looked to be a passing shadow sorrowful surprise followed by deep love.