I first came across the idea of reparenting when studying Redecision Therapy. It doesn’t take much to sense the holes left in a child by the wounds of neglect and abuse. The feelings of not quite good enough or able, the underlying feeling that there must be something wrong with me flow like toxic streams in the subconscious.
It’s no surprise that most of our clients and many of us come at life from within the tangles of these childhood wounds. The child’s very natural needs for affection, encouragement, recognition, connection all thwarted.
We don’t have to know all the stories and revisit all the memories at the headwaters of these streams. It’s enough to begin reparenting by using the world as a magic mirror.
Eliza survived a childhood of extreme neglect, manipulation, and abuse with surprising strength. Yet, of course, this experience wreaked havoc on her ability to trust and a host of other trauma related challenges. To help establish a pool of strong inner resources, we began discussing reparenting. I asked her to start collecting snapshots (not literal) of parents she witnesses demonstrating fulfilling the needs of the child, parents parenting in the ways she deserved and needed and maybe needs right now.
Over time, we integrated these snapshots. Eliza knew how to use Deep PEAT 4 and readily amped up her embodiment practice at home to include golden shadow work. Consequently, Eliza is gaining confidence and clarity about boundaries, safety, and trust.
Integrating both the dark and golden shadow is liberating. The wholeness resulting from shadow integration goes a long way towards increasing compassion for self and others while instilling inner strength and clarity.
Don’t you want this for your clients? Don’t you want this for you? Join us for the next virtual open house to learn more about our upcoming AAIT Foundations.