Have you noticed the subtle influence of shoulding in your life? If not, how can you expect clients to get better at recognizing this very natural mental pattern? Maybe it’s something you think a friend should do. Maybe it’s something you think you should do.
Mark was deep in the weeds as he described a situation with a new relationship. His story was peppered with language describing how the other guy felt and what he thought. It took me a minute before asking, Wait, did he TELL you this? Well, no.
Woven throughout the body of Zivorard Slavinski’s work is the influence of Roberto Assagiolo, On a low level of consciousness there are no solutions, and on high levels of consciousness, there are no problems. I’ve been leaning into my contemplation of this principle in the wake
Insight plays an important role in most psychotherapy. I am pretty solid in my belief that the most useful #Insights are the ones that arise following integration. – Insight does not produce change. Insight follows the neutralization of charged energy. The imposition of insight when there is
When our minds are brimming with worries about this or that, cluttered with the emotional pain that comes from encountering the challenges of life, we are simply less present. Our relationships suffer, our work suffers, our life experience suffers. – In those moments, we are
Suffering is a part of life. It is not the WHOLE of life, but it is a PART of life. It is enormously empowering to learn to navigate suffering with radical acceptance and integration of opposites. This understanding informs the AAIT principle, The integration of
We live in a bi-polar world. Day is inseparable from night. Night is inseparable from day. Men are inseparable from women. Women are inseparable from men. We cannot have one without the other. – We experience this dynamic of dualism psychologically. We feel this as
I first came across the idea of reparenting when studying Redecision Therapy. It doesn’t take much to sense the holes left in a child by the wounds of neglect and abuse. The feelings of not quite good enough or able, the underlying feeling that there